Saraphina

I'll tell it like it is, without anything added or taken away. All glory, praise, and thanks is due to our Heavenly Father. Also, for those who have supported me financially and continue to, and to all who continue to pray for me and the people of Paidha, I thank you. Because of you my dear friend can eat another day.
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She was walking slowly, as she always does, in front of me on the way to Mass this morning. Wearing a very worn white dress and her usual big flip flops. I skipped forward to great her before we walked in. Like always, the conversation was short due to the language barrier. She is beautiful. After Mass she hung around until I came out. I didn't know where she went so I continued on until I heard her call for me..

She's an old and frail women, weak and tired. Beautiful and reverent. She has tribe marks on her forehead, revealing a story that I would love to hear - mostly the part about her conversion and first sight of God.

Since the first time I met Saraphina she has looked at me with the same longing and glistening in her eyes as she asked me for food. I had nothing to give her, only my prayers. My heart ached for her and I spent a lot of time in prayer asking God what He wants me to do. I insist on doing all things through God, with purity of intention, caring from my depths for the one in front of me in a way that is willing the good of them, without my sometimes uncomfortable self getting in the way. You see, there's still much I have to learn. Both spiritually and culturally. The language is a big one as well. I am happy that love covers all and that those who are hungry can always be fed, despite any barrier or difference.

The first time I had tea with her was a Saturday morning. After Mass she came with me into my home (home being my room and sitting room at the rectory) and we ate breakfast together. She told me she went to bed very hungry and has been praying for a meal. Our conversations were filled with mostly laughter, only because my Alur isn't that good at all and she only knows a few words in English. All the same, I know we both enjoyed it.

Afterwards we collected some small fire wood from the Church and we went to her house. It is not too far from the Church, but for an old women it takes a while. She lives in a small hut by herself, near a garden with some graves in it. Her husband and all of her children but one, have died. We sat down in the dark room. She looked around putting her hands up with a shrug, and told me her house is bad (the expression is different in Alur).

Many children and young adults came to see what the white lady was doing there. It was my first time going to this small area of Paidha. They blocked all the light from entering Saraphina's home and giggled at my attempt to speak in Alur. I didn't stay long though..

That afternoon Obedi and I went to the market to buy food for the Church and for her. Evening came as we returned to the Church, Obedi went to cook supper and the seminarian, Francis, went with me to bring Saraphina food.

When we arrived, she was looking for more sticks and things to use as firewood in the garden in front of her house. I could see the joy on her face as she saw the food we brought. We all sat in her home and the seminarian translated for both of us. She talked of her husband and children's death..

"I am all alone in my poverty, all I can do is pray. I've been praying for you, Rannah, since you got here. There's nothing else for me to do, I just go to Church, and I pray."

She continued talking about prayer, Rosaries, her hunger, poverty, and trusting in God. She thanked God countless times for the food, recalling all of her prayers and hope. I broke down. She said "No, please, don't mind."

There is a heavy weight of physical poverty and brokenness that I can only see through my small eyes, not having experienced it myself. With compassion and pain in my heart, Christ has been allowing me to experience the tiniest bit of pain He feels for His beloved daughters and sons. I can't explain God's amazement, light, and love through Saraphina's eyes. I gave her food for her body. She gave me the love of God for my soul.. For it is Christ who is hungry, Christ who is poor, it is Christ who we serve through the poor in this world. What a treasure it will be to become one with Saraphina. No, what a treasure it is to be one with her, after all we are One, in Him and through Him. Every morning receiving the Eucharist with her - Christ's body and blood given for us, so we may all be ONE in Him.

All I could do is stare into her eyes, like Mary at the feet of Jesus, taking in every word He says. I see my grandmother in her and I see my mother. Who will care for my grandmother? Will I be there to care for my mother in her old age? Are you there to care for yours? Oh, how the Lord's way is good, perfect, and true.. His love manifests through eternity and brings comfort to all..

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Obedi and I went to the market this morning and bought lots of things. We carried them in big bags on are heads from the market, through town, down and up the valley of green grass and tall trees while children yell "rabolo" (banana: my name in sign language), past the graveyard behind the Church, through the village huts, finally arriving at Saraphina's house. Her son was there this time. Old, poor, and malnourished as she - with the same inviting and beautiful smile. Pounding away at dried casava for cooking into kwen. He lives here in Paidha "just the other side", as they say. He also has no money or ways of helping. He came over today to share a meal with his mom - in the hopes there was food! In God's goodness He provided!

I was saddened to hear from Saraphina that some of the food I brought last time had been stolen. It seems there has been bitter talk of Saraphina having this "new friend." She said jealousy perhaps, and so they took from her. Hmm. Although she hid the food and soap, they came in and went through everything to find it. Only though, they didn't take all. They left some for her. There isn't the tinniest bit of anger towards them from any of us, because well, they must be hungry too! Perhaps the person had kids to feed. What would I do in their position? What would you do? If only they had the faith to hold on, and perhaps the courage to ask? Ahh, I can't pose any advice, I am ignorant of the situation. Pray with me that they too may be filled, in an honest and eternal way!

Obedi and I walked home slowly, talking of poverty, culture, and asking each other questions. She asked me, with a puzzled look on her face, if I will help others like Saraphina, or if its only her. I told her yes, yes I will. The person God places before me I will help in the way I can, the way He asks, praying always that I will receive them all the more!

We must help each other in this world, each giving and each receiving at all times, most of all, though, be giving to and receiving from Our Father!

St. Teresa of Calcutta, pray for us!